The Credit Game
Everybody fighting for
the best score
all so when they
borrow the money
to buy the things they
need to pretend they
can afford the life they
believe they
deserve, the
bank will offer
a little more lube.
Wisdom They say you gotta read to be successful. Then, you go to the library and it’s just homeless people thumbing through the classics stinking the place up. But, at closing time, they grab their rags, and grocery bags, and return to their boxes under the bridge to live like Diogenes - who, even Alexander the Great admired. So, I guess success is subjective.
All Figured Out
Son: Dad, I’m gonna be a comedian.
Dad: Sure son. But go to college. Have a back up plan.
Son: Sure thing, Dad. I’ll go to film school.
Dad: Uh. OK. Well, have a backup plan for college too, then.
Son: No problem. If things don’t work out, I can become a homeless alcoholic.
Dad: Sounds like you’ve got it all figured out.
Messiah
You can’t spell Messiah
without Mess.
R.I.P. Grandma - 2055 A.D.
Grandma died this week.
It was unexpected.
She didn’t annunciate the safe word.
The word was wash.
She kept saying “warsh.”
#sad
She went off to heaven,
hog-tied, with a hook up her ass,
and her bull,
crying in the corner
while Grandpa was
holding the camera
and beating off
through the whole ordeal -
a cuck til the end.
It will be her final Only Fans post
😞
early enough...
all science
is fiction.
Miscegeny
I'm dating a black woman.
We fucked on the first date.
But, she says, we gotta wait until marriage
before I can touch her hair.
Jokes
Some are okay.
Others, they suck.
But they're all in good fun,
so who gives a fuck?
Should
There is no Should,
only Is.
Should is subjective and always changing.
Should is a sand dune.
Should is hope, faith, dreams and wishes.
Should is not reality.
Reality is the dominion of Is.
Should is a cloud
Awe-inspiring, silver-lined, and fleeting
Always blocking out the true blue of Is.
Is is what you’re facing.
Is is what you need to solve.
Is is real life.
Should is Instagram and mascara.
Should is debt, plastic surgery, and big is beautiful.
Should bends you to its will
against your own self interest.
Should is a parasite.
Should is warm, euphoric and comforting -
the opiate of the opinionated.
Is is gay.
Is is poor people too dumb to help themselves.
Is is no easy deaths.
Is is ugly and raw.
Is is overweight, unhealthy, scary and mean.
Is is dumb money, nepotism, and big egos.
Is doesn’t give a fuck about you,
you must be looking for Should.
Is sucks.
Should is your mom,
reminding you how great you are,
if only the world would fall in line.
Should is recycling, carpools and work-life balance.
Should is what you’re told will work
even without evidence.
Should is politeness, unity and empathy.
Is is what you got.
The sooner you can make Is your bitch
The quicker things will become
as they should be.